Skip to main content

The Force of Divorce (part 2)

The force of divorce is a violent wind that rips and tears through families much like a hurricane, destroying homes and cities, leaving its survivors deeply scarred and changed forever. The force of divorce is an unforgiving and unmerciful god of destruction that we created because we are fallen, broken, messed up individuals. If marriage is a reflection of God’s perfect love and intimacy, divorce is a cracked mirror that reflects our depravity and hatred for one another; symbolizing our desire to be separated, dissolved, and disconnected from true love.

The force of divorce paralyzes our spirits and undermines our hope to find true intimacy. It spits in the face of family, kicking our children in the stomach. God hates divorce. It has been labeled a necessary evil in a society that mocks the institution of holy matrimony. Even the Bible documents its dark legacy. Some may suggest that divorce is acceptable because it was included in the Mosiac Law (Deut. 24:1-4). But with a bit more depth of understanding, we discover that Moses permitted divorce, not because God had no problem with it, but because the hearts of His people were so hardened (Matt 19:8). To me, divorce is like having a gun in the home. You hope you never have to use it, but you feel more secure in the darkness knowing it’s there when you need it. Even if that security may be a false one, for like a thief in the night, divorce snatches away more than our material possessions, but it robs us of our vision of intimacy and our willingness to trust our hearts in the hands of another flawed individual. We’re guarded, defensive, emotionally persecuted and deeply wounded. Heaven help the next person who comes along and attempts to love to us, even if that next person is God.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Watching My Step

I've always had big feet. It's true. There was never a moment in my childhood when my feet were not an object of frustration and ridicule. And those "dogs" were all over the place, facing the wrong direction, tripping over themselves, tripping over coffee tables, desks, chairs, other people. It was embarrasing. Watching my step was a full time job. Since becoming a man, I've mastered my former oppressors (my size 14's) and you would hardly noticed my attention to detail. However, today, at 40, I'm still watching my step. With so much experience and success with walking and watching my step, I've discovered that the same is true in my spiritual life as well. I haven't always watched my step in life and of course, it resulted in me finding myself in all kinds of traps, snares and dead ends. I've spent years tripping over my sinful habits and walking down dirt roads that lead to nowhere. To no one's blame but my own. After experiencin...
1 comment
Read more

The Force of Divorce (Part 3)

If we as adults experience this horrific effect of the force of divorce, how much more do our children ache and groan from an unreachable wound? A wound that will fester and spread an infection, if at some point they never get healing. Even though I was blessed with my period of beforeness, the force of divorce crashed down on my little life, sending the foundation of everything I held as stable and true into a violent whirlwind. And I was one of the “lucky” ones, by the our society’s perspective. I was never physically abused by my father; never had to sleep under the bed at night for fear of what the night would bring. I was swept away in the middle of the night by my mother and a priest who rushed us to the airport. Somehow my dad caught up with us and I remember he had one of my arms and my mom had the other both of them pulling me in opposite directions. How about that for a visual of a broken family? My mother won the tug of war and I boarded an airplane...
Post a Comment
Read more

She Knew Me. (My Tribute to Dr. Maya Angelou)

I didn't know her as one knows a neighbor a relative or a friend she was not in my list of contacts or photographs or yearbooks of a time long ago no, i did not know her but she knew me she definitely knew me she knew my pain, my struggle her words, songs, poetry they checked my pulse gauged my temperature measured my resolve her suffering leveled my consciousness she was quite acquainted with joy, pain silence, sound, standing, dancing stillness and marching on she defied invisibility and found her place centerstage I loved her for it no, I did not know Dr. Maya Angelou but she knew me she definitely knew me.
Post a Comment
Read more