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A Letter to My 15 Year Old Self (Day 2)


Dear Edward,

I have a few things to say you that I wish were said to you a long time ago.  But since I have this time machine, I have some wise words to share with you.  First of all, stop looking for a girlfriend.  Trust me on this one.  You will never find what you are looking for in a girl.  Not even the girl of your dreams.  And by the way, your dreams? Dream bigger than being accepted.  What you are looking for is your identity.  I love Mark Twain’s quote “the two most important days in a man’s life are the day he was born and the day he finds out why.”  Your purpose is found in God, your creator.  He made you exactly as he pleased.  You are not a mistake or a strain on someone’s life.  You are not responsible for your parents divorce.  You are not perfect, but you are not hard to love.  In fact, the One who is called “Love” loves you deeply.

I know you’ve heard that before, but take some time and let that sink in to you.  God loves you.  He just does.  Your dad may not have understood what a son needs, but your Heavenly Father knows exactly what you need.  You are his son.  When you accept that,  you will find the love, the identity and purpose in which you were made. 

This whole dating thing is pretty pointless.  Enjoy high school, don’t just survive it.  Dating is this mad emotional race to hear “I love you” and then it becomes this race to see who will break the other one’s heart first.  There is no binding promises or covenants nor commitments that can link two confused teen-agers together.  Not enough ink for love letters, songs on the radio or tears in the eyes to halt the inevitable.  I know that sounds harsh, but it’s not harder than the heartbreak you are heading for in the next two years.  By the way, it will crush you but it wont kill you.  It’s not your fault.  It’s really not her fault either.  You both said things and made impossible promises that no undeveloped human being could possibly keep. 

Another thing. Learn piano! Please do it for the both of us!  You know you love music.  Make it! Play it! Find your own melody and play it.  Keep writing.  Write about everything.  Write books along with your plays and poetry.  Play more basketball! and don’t quit the team.  Trust me, it’s more rewarding to get cut than to flat out quit.  You will have a long time forgiving yourself for that one.  You will never forget it.  In fact it will be one of the lessons you will share with your players later on.  Yes you will coach basketball!  So learn to play the game. 

Back to the whole girlfriend thing.  You don’t want to go through the pain and frustration of being in a relationship.  You will hear all kinds of lies about why it’s so important that you be like everybody else.  You will hear many girls say, “I love you” but those words will mean nothing until you’ve heard them from your wife!  Yes there will be Mrs. Baptiste!  Now, I’ll let you get back to playing Pac Man.  And fear not! the ‘Pause” button is coming soon!  


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